by Andrea Nierenberg

Courtesy ASME’s Affinity Partner, American Management Association (AMA)

People make a decision in 3 to 5 seconds whether they like you, and want to hear what you have to say based on the image you project. In the "Grocery Store of Life," where everyone is vying for shelf space, think about what you can do to get that competitive edge. Are you repackaged, with a new inner and outer "face lift"?

A great way to make you more appealing is to consistently greet others with a sincere smile. Remember to look directly in their eyes, which conveys confidence and shows your interest. Also, you will make a better impression when you listen more and say less. It affords you the opportunity to learn more.

Of course, when it is time to speak up, use well-chosen words and consciously avoid phases that diminish your image. To better appreciate some expressions to avoid, take a look at these illustrations:

• "I'll try..." This does not sound positive or specific. It’s better to say, "I will be there at 8:00 p.m. and will call if something comes up."
   
• "I can't..." If that is true, then other people will wonder if you will be able to take other challenges. Instead say, "Let me tell you what I can do."
   
• "I'm wondering if..." Wondering is something you do when you have time to stare at the stars all night. You'll make better progress when you ask directly, "What day will you respond to my request?"
   
• "I should have..." Be more respectful of others' deadlines. It’s better to say, "I'll have this done next Monday. How does that work for you?"
   
• "To be honest..." This one really hurts. It’s just a filler, and people may wonder if you normally always lie to them.

In addition to our words, good manners and gracefulness will always give our image a boost. This is especially true with protocol. In fact, there may even be times when we don't know the correct social etiquette, so to be safe, be conservative. It’s like presuming that you can call someone you just met for the first time by his or first name. Better to address the person with "Mr." or "Ms.", and then wait for permission to be on a first name basis.

Remember the expression, "What you see is what you get"? Now is the time to make sure your professional image gives other people the best possible impression of what you have to offer.

Author Bio: Andrea Nierenberg is a keynote speaker for trade shows, including AMA conferences. One of her most popular addresses and audio programs is Grow Wings & Fly: Keys to Motivational Skills. www.selfmarketing.com.